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But that’s not even the hardest part—that comes when you actually start talking to them and realize you have absolutely no clue how to have a conversation with someone who doesn’t actually know you.

Not only that, divorce doesn’t necessarily boost your self confidence, so all of those feelings of inadequacy you’ve been fighting off immediately come to the surface as soon as the guy you’ve been chatting with ghosts you or you realize the other guy just wanted casual sex.

It is far too terrifying to be alone in that water when she does not know how to handle it.

Now fast forward a year or so and Sara has learned to hold her breath and kick her feet; she’s put on her floaties and is splashing merrily in the deep end.

And if you can’t communicate your feelings, finding a partner won’t be easy.

Some might think that they are ready to jump into dating right away, while others feel like they'll never be able to have a relationship again.

But suddenly the rough-housing older boys in the pool have pushed her under, she’s gulping in water, and with her fear threatening to weigh her down she almost drowns.

Miraculously she makes her way to the steps, climbs out, and wraps herself in a towel.

But try to drag her away into the scary deep waters where she can't touch bottom and you invite pure panic!

Kicking, screaming, and clawing her way across your face and out of your arms, she try to thrash back to the side to the steps, where she was happiest.